31 July 2010

Hello? Remember Me?

I'm doubting no one remembers me because I've certainly not had any comments asking where I was or if I'd fallen off of the face of the earth!! Haha I've taken a very long blogging break - from posting and reading - and I'm hoping that I can start doing both again. 

So, I've got some important news to share with you all. I kind of eluded to it back in May but I wasn't comfortable sharing anything at that point but now that it's been over 3 months, I'm sure that my decision was the right one. Will and I are separated. Well, as separated as you can be when you're forced to still cohabitate with each other. I've been looking very hard for full-time employment, sent out dozens of resumes and nothing has panned out yet. I did have an interview this past Wednesday and the lady was super nice and seemed interested but she did let me know that she wasn't hiring until the third or fourth week of August. Please, please keep your fingers, toes, eyes crossed that I'll get the job. It's one that will actually pay me enough to live on. 

So, aside from that bit of news, I thought I'd also share with you all this bit of happiness - I've lost 36.5 pounds since April!!! Isn't that amazing?? I take a new picture every week right before I go dancing and I can really see the difference in my face. Here are a few pictures from the middle of May through this month.






Things have been stressful as all hell here at home, as I'm sure you can imagine, but I'm making do as best as possible. My family has offered to come help me pack up and to move me back down to SC but I just really don't want to do that. I mean I like Maryland, this is my home now. I guess if I can't find any permanent full-time work that I'll have to move back but I'm praying it doesn't come to that. 

So, remember the earlier this spring when I was absolutely panicking about turning 30? Well, as it turns out, this has been a fabulous year so far! Turning 30 left me feeling so empowered - the changes have been amazing. I finally felt like I could leave a bad situation, with no regrets, knowing I'd done my absolute best to work it out and that it just wasn't going to happen. I've focused - really focused - on losing weight and getting in shape. I work out several times a week, I've given up beer (replaced it with rum & diet coke!) and I still haven't had chocolate since I gave it up for Lent!! As I said in my last blog post, I go dancing every single Saturday night. I love dancing and that's something I'm never giving up again. I've realized that giving up parts of who I am and what I like, really sucked the life out of me. I'm only sorry that it took me 7 long years to realize that!! 

I was home alone last night and I was feeling a bit down (surprisingly!) so instead of sitting here and allowing myself to wallow in my own misery, I decided I'd do something I hadn't done in way too long - I got crafty!! I started digging through boxes of craft crap, I mean supplies, and I found this:

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An old composition notebook I scored at the thrift store for 45 cents. Actually, there are two of them and this is the second one. I kind of forgot to take a picture of the other one before I started altering it! Anyway, the pages are numbered, slightly yellowed and it's perfect for recording all of the new changes in my life. I really found the inspiration for even doing this kind of journal by reading this blog: Thrifty Miss Priss. Robin is so crafty & creative and I just love the journals she makes. They're always crammed full of vintage goodness so I hope mine turns out half as good as hers! 

So, the ugly gray comp notebook went from plain & boring to this:

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I used the word bliss as a reminder of what I'm looking for. A life that's happy and stress-free. One that's full of love and peace and serenity. One that's filled with things I truly treasure. Of course, I had to use my favorite colors for the cover and some of the inside pages but I also went through my stacks of magazines from the 30s and 40s and found hilarious pictures that are so applicable to my current situation so I had to rip those out & put them throughout the journal. This one cracks me up:

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Bwaaaaaaaahahaha Notice how I had to add in the word "not". And that's just the reality of the situation. It wasn't forever. I mean sure, if I'd felt like spending the rest of my life being constantly betrayed and lied to, it probably could've lasted forever, but I deserve so much more than that!! 

My journal-ish notebook thingie is definitely going to be a work in progress, which is how it should be - I'll add to it here & there, tweak it into what I want it to be and I'll treasure it always! It's a permanent reminder of my life as it is now! 

Anyway, I should get going. I need to clean the house, package an Etsy order, get dressed and go to my second favorite store on earth - Target!! Hope you all are having great summers. I'll try to stop by soon & catch up with everyone!!